Insomnia isn't particularly fun. Neither are dreams.

Genetics are a funny thing. My dad can fall asleep as long as he can keep his eyes shut for 10 continuous seconds. My mom sleeps for about 27 minutes a night total, and that's in the recliner in front of the TV. Guess whose sleep genes I inherited? Lucky me. Strangely enough, you get me in a car or an airplane and I will fall asleep almost instantly, regardless of what's going on. Not cool when I'm driving, but I haven't killed myself yet, so I guess I rock at sleepdriving. Good thing my commute to work is only 12 minutes. Yes, I have it down to that much of a science. This is my life, and somehow you're stuck reading about it.

Anyway, on the subject of sleep, dreams are strange. Especially when they're my dreams. Keep in mind that I don't dream much, because dreams require one to enter REM sleep, which means you have to sleep continuously for a few hours, not wake up every 42 minutes or so. Yes, I have it down to that much of a science. Anyway, last night was one of those rare nights where I actually had a dream. Being the lucky guy that I am, the dream sucked. I don't remember much, but I do remember very vividly part of the fingernail on my thumb just coming off. It was like a door on a hinge, and it just kind of got yanked out, leaving this open square space where it looked like someone had just taken an x-acto knife and cut it out. It didn't hurt or anything, but I remember trying to find some way to keep the gaping hole in my thumb from getting infected, but there was no gauze or anything like that, as there never is in dreams. Whenever you need something in a dream, you will never, ever be able to find it. I hate that. Anyway, my subconscious, not being content with me simply having a mutilated thumb, decides to start throwing fun stuff at me in the dream. When I say fun, I mean stuff that sucks. People kept asking me to hold stuff, none of it clean, most of it drippy, nasty stuff, like wet nasty trash bags or rotten vegetables. After that somebody pushed me into a dirty pool. Stupid crap like that. After the pool thing I woke up to my alarm, which had apparently been going off for a solid 20 minutes. Great way to start the day. A day which, apparently, is still continuing.

I'm still trying to figure out what the hell that dream means. I've heard that when your teeth fall out in a dream, that means you have a fear of getting older, or something like that. Gee, what does having a mutilated thumbnail that you're petrified of getting infected signify, other than mental instability? If it's really bad, please don't tell me.