Saturday, April 30, 2005

Crap?

Another quiz from that same site. Sorry, Jacksonville, but it looks like I'm destined to move to Austin, Texas. I tried changing my answers to about 5 or 6 different questions and Austin still came up every single time. Either the whole quiz has an Austin bias or I'm just an Austin guy and I never even knew it. My friend Sherrie (an ex-Austinite) would be so proud.






American Cities That Best Fit You:



75% Austin

70% Atlanta

70% Washington, DC

50% Denver

50% Honolulu



Y'know, I could handle Honolulu, too. Except I'd be ineligible for all sort of contests and they probably don't have Taco Bells, and even if they do, they probably don't carry Mountain Dew Baja Blast and then life just wouldn't be worth living anymore. I guess I need to stick with Austin.

Crap!

I love how these little quiz things can somehow figure out exactly what I like and don't like just by me answering some multiple-choice questions and such. Of course, this particular quiz just has you checking off music artists you like. Now, if there was a way to check off artists you hate, that would make it a hundred times better. But there isn't, unfortunately. Still, it has figured out my exact musical taste to the percentile, even though none of the artists I'd list as my top 10 favorites are on it, save for Radiohead and The Cure. And the fact that downtempo isn't a category, according to them, and neither is acid jazz or even jazz in general. Forget "trip hop" too. And the fact that the only old-school hip hop artist on their little list worth anything was LL Cool J. I guess that's why I'm apparently a bastion of Alternative music, both '80s and '90s. And gangsta rap. When I'm finished, bring the yellow tape. Represent.




Your Taste in Music:


80's Alternative: Highest Influence
90's Alternative: Highest Influence
80's R&B: High Influence
Gangsta Rap: High Influence
80's Pop: Medium Influence
90's Hip Hop: Medium Influence
Alternative Rock: Medium Influence
Dance: Medium Influence
Old School Hip Hop: Medium Influence
Progressive Rock: Medium Influence
Punk: Medium Influence
80's Rock: Low Influence
90's R&B: Low Influence
Adult Alternative: Low Influence
Classic Rock: Low Influence



Notice how I bitch and complain about these online quizzes, then go and fill them out anyway? I'm such a lemming.

I know you're all anxiously awaiting Day 5 pictures and The HMV/Virgin Megastore Megahaul. But, as Mick said, you can't always get what you want. Axl would tell you that you just need a little patience. And that quiz tells me Classic and '80s Rock are low on my musical totem pole. Go figure.

Thursday, April 28, 2005

Crap.

Survivor went late, Stephenie got the boot, I have nobody to root for anymore, I'm dead tired, and I must be on time to work tomorrow, so you'll have to wait for the Day 5 recap.

What does this mean? You get filler. Found one of those stupid music surveys, so hey, why the hell not? I'm sure none of you will read it anyway. My notes in small red print...

iTunes/iPod Survey!
How many total songs?

10382 songs, 32.9 days, 42.26 GB

Yeah, if only the battery lasted that long...


Sort by Song Title

first:
Reps - "'Bout the City"

last: Pavement - "Zürich Is Stained"
I honestly don't think I've ever listened to either of these songs. I think the first one is from the Jet Set Radio soundtrack, so I probably heard it while playing the game or something.

Sort by Time

first: Kid Koala - "Strat Hear" (0:05)
last:
Portishead - "Essential Mix 23 Apr 1995" (1:58:22)


Sort by Album
first: (the best of) New Order
last:
Zooropa - U2

I have listened to both of these plenty of times. The New Order disc has the honor of being the one that got trapped in my old car CD player when it died completely, and only got released once I completely dismantled it a year or two later because I wanted to hear "True Faith." True story.

Top Ten Most Played Songs
Mos Def - "Umi Says (Zero 7 Mix)" (26 times)

DJ Shadow - "Changeling" (21 times)

Beck - "Missing" (17 times)
Zero 7 - "Morning Song" (14 times)
Michael Jackson vs. Q-Tip - "Don't Stop 'Til You Get Enough/Breathe And Stop mashup" (11 times)

Jeff Buckley - "Sweet Thing" (8 times)
Franz Ferdinand - "Auf Achse" (8 times)

Blackalicious - "First In Flight" (7 times)
Coldplay - "Bigger Stronger" (7 times)
Massive Attack - "Black Milk" (6 times)

I will mention that my song counts got reset a month or two ago, so we may never know the true playcounts.

Ten Recently Played Songs

Ozomatli - "Cut Chemist Suite"

Talking Heads - "Once In A Lifetime"

Digital Underground - "Doowutchyalike"

REM - "Strange"

311 - "Down"

The Cure - "Mint Car (acoustic version)"

New Order - "Crystal"

Interpol - "Obstacle 1"

The Beta Band - "Assessment"

Beth Gibbons & Rustin Mann - "Romance"

I love the shuffle feature. Absolutely love it.

Find "sex," how many songs show up?
117
Find "death," how many songs show up?
20

Find "love," how many songs show up?
426
Wow, that was a waste of time, huh?

OK, I'm dumb...

This is the actual link to the complete video for "E-Pro." I linked the stupid article and not the video last night...

The real video for "E-Pro"!

Is it wrong to want the president out of office if only so I can watch Survivor on time?

Wednesday, April 27, 2005

The England Vacation Day 4: London

Day 4 was, by far, the best day of the trip weather-wise. After putting up with rainy weather in the 40s and 50s, we went outside to find that it was bright, sunny and in the upper 60s-low 70s. That kind of day just feels that much better after you've suffered through all the others. We knew this would be the day to go on The Eye, since you get weather like this maybe three days out of every four years or so in London. Well, it's close to that. People told me. Honest.



Anyway, here we are on the Millennium Bridge that crosses the Thames. Obviously, The Eye is in the background. The Eye was built to celebrate the whole year 2000 thing. It was scheduled to be taken down, but once they realized what a hassle that would be, they changed their minds. Their decision was helped by the fact that people like me are willing to pay $25 apiece to ride the thing for half an hour. Believe me, there were plenty of people willing to pay to go up on a day like that.

We were probably the only two people in London who owned sunglasses. Just making an observation. Keep the size of those pods in the background in mind...



Cause here we are at the summit. Notice how many people are in that big old pod. That's a lot of money. Then think of how many pods go around on that giant ferris wheel all day long. To think they considered tearing the damn thing down. No wonder the giant English empire was whittled down to one measly island...



Big Ben, again. I like the depth of field that this shot has going on. That's about all I can say. I took a LOT more shots than this, but I'll spare you (and my bandwidth) by not posting them. I did get my $25 worth in digital pictures, though.

After this we went around to some of the market districts, which was cool, if uneventful. I stopped in a place called Gadget Shop, but it was all crap. I'm a gadget guy, and I was glad they were going out of business their stuff sucked so bad. We moved on.



This is the oldest restaurant in London, established in 1798. We considered eating there, until we realized that neither of us had won the lottery, so we instead opted for dinner at the pub right near my sister's flat. She'd never been there, for some odd reason. The food was great and the Guinness was on tap, so it was a good evening. They even had free wireless internet in there if you were so inclined to use a computer in a pub. I did wish I had a PSP to test out, but then thought better of it, considering I was in a pub. Great place. Hillary even discovered a new drink, a strawberry beer from Belgium called Früli. The only possible thing that could bug me is that bartender didn't give me the perfect pour on the Guinness. That's a truly minor complaint, and proof that you can't have everything, I guess.

I didn't even have to use my A.K. I gotta say it was a good day.

Coming Tomorrow:
The HMV/Virgin Megastore Megahaul!

"Talking trash to the garbage around you..."

Beck is on a roll. Not only does he have what I consider to be the best album so far this year, he's also got the best video. Granted, it's the only video I've seen so far this year, but considering the generic movie parodies that pass for 95% of the videos I saw last time I watched MTV, I'm gonna stick with that statement. It was made by Shynola, the guys who made the very cool video for Radiohead's "Pyramid Song" a few years ago. It's one of those videos that can actually make me like the song more, even if the lyrics seem to have nothing to do with what's on screen. Good stuff.

Watch it and enjoy.

Tuesday, April 26, 2005

The England Vacation Day 3: Cardiff, Wales

I really didn't feel like posting tonight, but I'm gonna stay on schedule if it kills me, dammit. Feel lucky or something.

Don't ever call ask someone who's Welsh if they're English. They really hate that. There's some sort of identity thing going on there, and it's kind of like asking some redneck southerner if they're from New York City. They'll get offended, even if they do live in the same country (the United Kingdom, to be correct -- yes, I know I should change the title of this post, but I'm not gonna.)

Anyway, we left our lovely little hotel with attached pub in the middle of nowhere and hit the road to Cardiff. On the way there, I may as well mention the Welsh language, which seems to me to be completely incomprehensible. This is a language that definitely needs to buy a vowel. Take a look:



Seriously, what the hell is that? I've heard they're actually considering moving over to entirely Welsh road signs and markings, instead of the dual-language stuff they've got going on right now. It's one thing to have the whole national identity thing, it's another entirely to force money-spending people like me never to come back because it looks like everyone threw random letters all over the place.



Before we went to Cardiff, we stopped by our friends' houses. This was the scene of one of my "random falling asleep two hours after I got up" jet lag episodes. The Welsh must think I'm like the rudest, laziest American ever. Oh well. Anyway, we went to an outdoor museum that depicted life in Wales in the late 19th Century and early 20th Century. It was a nice day and it was free, so that was cool. There were also lots of sheep, as seen above. Fun!

From here we journeyed to Cardiff, home of a soccer (er, football) match between two visiting teams, which made traffic just that much more fun. I sure know how to pick those days, I tell ya. Anyway, our first stop was Cardiff Castle:



This is the interior keep, which afforded a pretty neat view of Cardiff from the top. I wish they had a more original name for the castle, but they don't. Of course, it's pretty much smack dab in the middle of the city, so they may as well keep the name. It does have a Welsh name too, but I forget because it was something like "Chrgftkljmnrwspordghtcxrl." Don't quote me on that, though. I may have missed a "d" somewhere in there.

Again, this is another place built on top of Roman ruins. The Romans built the exterior wall and a large part of the interior. The Welsh cherry-picked the rest of it and made a castle of it. I wish my house was built on top of Roman ruins. I never have that kind of luck, though. Mine's probably built on Indian burial ground ruins. Lucky me.

After we left the castle to head to a pub for some food and drink, the soccer (er, football) match ended and fans piled onto the streets. Wrexham had defeated South End 2-0. I attempted to start a soccer riot by walking along the South End fans and shouting stuff like, "Wrexham is wretarded!" but it just didn't work. They all thought I was retarded for even trying that one. There would be no hooliganism that afternoon, sadly. I guess you have to go to Italy where they shoot flares and firebomb the opposing team's players to get the really fun behavior. My kind of fans over there!

It turns out we were only 190 miles from the city with the longest name. Here it is, in all it's glory (click to get a better view):



Something tells me the city was never gonna live up to the name. You never know, it could be party central.

After some food and beverage at another Welsh pub, we took a bus back to London, which yielded exactly zero pictures, but did allow me to listen to my bitchin' playlist. Even if I had no pictures to show for a 3-hour bus ride, at least I was back in the big city, ready to ride the tube and spend lots of money for basic human necessities, such as food and Guinness. I was also introduced to my sister's tiny little flat, which I will discuss tomorrow.

Coming tomorrow:
A Sunny Monday in London (believe it!)

Monday, April 25, 2005

Loads of musical fun!

This may not be my favorite song so far this year (that honor goes to Beck's "Missing") but this is definitely the one that's the most fun. Old school in so many awesome ways...

"Breakfast Club" - Z-Trip featuring Murs and Supernatural

Please save to disk so you don't completely destroy my bandwidth, kids. If you like this, you really have no excuse not to grab a copy of the Z-Trip disc, considering it's less than $10 at Best Buy or pretty much anywhere. The rest of it isn't quite as cool as this track, but it's still damn good and worth it for that price.



Buy it! 15% off at Amazon, just like it says! You even get a copy of the sticker he's holding!

The England Vacation Day 2: The City of Bath

Day 2 started off pretty well, with a delicious breakfast at a B&B in Bath. Plenty of toast, eggs, fried ham, cereal, etc. People that say all English food is crap aren't always correct. Most of it is, but this meal certainly was not. Anyway, I was ready to go, despite the jet lag still having an effect on me. Jet lag is an odd thing. Even though you've had a full-night's sleep, you are liable to fall asleep at any point if you're sufficiently comfortable. Needless to say, it was best that I not drive anywhere.

Our first stop was the Roman Baths. Luckily, we were within walking distance of the baths, so I'd be able to make it without falling asleep. Bath feels very old and European. It seemed as if all of the buildings were about three stories tall, so this kind of makes every street feel like an alley. Not alley in a bad "I'm going to get jumped and beaten" way, mind you. Walking around Bath makes you feel more enclosed than walking around in most cities. It did keep the foot traffic and the vehicle traffic separated quite well -- another plus.



The Roman Baths are pretty interesting. They were discovered originally by the Celts and then taken over by the Romans (obviously.) They used to be quite a sacred place. The water is warm year-round, due to gases released from deep within the earth, which must have freaked out the primitives quite a bit. Once the Romans were repelled, the temple fell into disrepair and wasn't unearthed until the 18th Century. It's amazing how smart the Romans were, really. All sorts of stuff that they constructed is still there, and still works.



These are some of the things that most interested me inside. They are ancient curses, carved into pieces of metal and thrown into the well to appeal to the gods or goddesses. The people who threw them into the sacred spring seem to have been pretty pissed off. Imagine if that was the only trace of you left on this earth. This got me a little worried about the fact that this was the last post I made before I left for England. With my luck, in 1,000 years, when someone is browsing the mind-beam-internet-or-whatever thing of the future, that will be the only post remaining of this little site. Grobnak43 or whatever his name is in the year 3005 will be talking about how petty and stupid people in the early 21st century must have been after reading that. Sorry for letting you all down in advance. I'd much rather he read this or this, but I guess you play the cards you're dealt, huh? I do kind of wonder if the people these dudes were cursing got what was coming to them in the end or not. I guess we'll never know.



Those Romans were pretty ingenious dudes. They would stack these stones underneath the floor, then let the heat circulate between them, creating a sauna in the room above. I can't even keep any heat in my house when it gets cold, so these guys were already a leg up on me a millennia ago. It's kind of depressing to think about, to be honest. Maybe even more so than Grobnak43 thinking I'm an idiot.



If you look at the top photo of this post, you can see the outside of Bath Abbey in the background. This is the inside, which is pretty ornate. That's one thing the U.S. just doesn't have any of -- lavishly-decorated-due-to-government-funding churches. Let those scary psycho religious zealot Dominionists take over the government any more than they have already and maybe we will. Yeah, my glass is half-full right now. Honest. I probably wouldn't be allowed in any of the churches to photograph them if those guys got into power, though. Still, this one was very neat looking.



Getting back on track, this is the guy who was in the plaza outside the Baths and the Abbey. He's juggling knives while riding a unicycle while wearing a tutu and Doc Martens and telling jokes at the same time. I'll mention that it was 40-something degrees and windy out there, so even more credit to him. This guy was awesome. He's my hero. I could try to enjoy performing on the street as much as him, but he'd be a tough act to follow. I don't look good in a tutu either. That is a pure assumption on my part, I will add.

After this we met up with our friends' Welsh friends and made our way into Wales. There was a great pub attached to our little tiny motel in the middle of nowhere, in which lots of Murphy's was consumed before my jet lag caught up with me. I also had the best shepherd's pie ever in there. It was a good day.

Coming tomorrow:
Day 3 In Cardiff, Or How Maki Learned To Stop Trying To Read Welsh And Love The Pint.

As promised: The England Vacation Day 1

Okay! I think you all know how Day Zero went, with me having an escalatingly animous conversation with an airline drone. I made it safe and sound, made my connection and all that jazz, so life was good on that front. The trouble started once I got there.

I had no idea where we were supposed to be meeting.

I was told to meet "outside of the terminal." That sounds all well and good until you realize that Heathrow is set up in a very strange manner. There are three terminals, and it seems as if there's no place for people who aren't buses or taxis to park or do the keep-circling-the-airport thing, at least at Terminal 3, my terminal. I go outside and take a look around, though I don't even know what kind of vehicle will be picking me up. This exercise ends in a predictably futile manner, and I feel like a moron. At this point I'm getting annoyed and slightly worried. Things wouldn't be so bad if my cell phone worked in foreign countries so I could call and figure out what was going on. Alas, my cell phone would continue to search for service that would never arrive. Bummer. I guess that's what I get for having the world's oldest cell phone and a Verizon "Weak-Ass Plan."

Anyway, I figure this would be the time to get some British Pounds, the currency of the realm. That way I can use the incredibly high-priced payphone to call and see what's going on. Of course, I'm forced to buy something so I can get some actual change to use in the phone. I pick up a small little Snickers candy bar (which I later learn cost me almost $2. Yeah, you read that right.) I get change, make the call and finally get a hold of my mom, who's got the rented car and my sister's cell phone. It turns out they've been driving for almost 2 hours already, stuck in traffic. The best part is that they estimate they're still a good 90 minutes from the airport. I've already been here about 90 minutes already. London is seeming like a better and better place by the minute. I sit down, read a magazine, and keep an eye on my bags.

Ninety minutes pass...

I venture forth into the slight drizzle and 40-something-degree (Fahrenheit, never could figure out that Celsius crap) weather outside. I'm looking at random cars like a complete imbecile (or a writer for Joey, not sure which is worse.) I'm hoping to recognize the driver of at least one of them. At this point I notice that there are no SUVs whatsoever. Not a few, not less, none. I'm liking London a little bit more for this fact. They drive some tiny cars around there, though. Extra-tiny. Like enclosed-golf-cart-after-some-kinda-miniaturization-process tiny. I worry for my legs just a little bit. Finally I see some little blue minivan-hatchback-type-thing and recognize my mom and two of her friends in the car. I've never been so happy to see a microscopic car in my life. I was finally free of this wretched airport. I could finally start my vacation. This must be how Andy Dufresne felt after crawling through a sewer, etc., etc. I pile my crap in the car, we park it and then hop on the subway (aka "The Tube") and head down to Trafalgar Square for lunch.

I guess I may as well mention that I've been up for about 26 hours at this point. That's when the picture I posted earlier was taken. Here's just the nice fountain and tall statue, without me blocking the view this time:



We cross the street and go to this church:



It's called St. Martin In The Fields Church. Don't ask me why they added the In The Fields part. I'd think St. Martin's would do just fine. Maybe they had too many St. Martin's churches around and had to differentiate them somehow. I guess I'll never know. Anyway, this one has a crypt beneath where there are actual graves that make up the floor. I know what you're thinking at this point. "Hey, that would make a bitchin' place for a cafeteria-style restaurant!" You'd be right. They made the crypt into a cafeteria-style restaurant. Cause, hey, why the hell not, right? Click that if you want to read tombstones. Creepy.



After lunch we walked down the street to check out Parliament, Big Ben and the other fun stuff. It's interesting that all in that little area you have Trafalgar Square, Leicester Square, Picadilly Circus, Westminster Abbey, Parliament, Big Ben and 10 Downing Street. That's like if Washington DC's major landmarks were all within 4 or 5 blocks of each other. Pretty convenient, if you ask me. You can't get anywhere near 10 Downing Street anymore, though. I guess the terrorists did win. Bummer.



This is The Eye, a giant ferris wheel they built for the whole Year 2000 stuff, but decided to leave up since people will pay $25 to ride it. It's quite big, considering I'm across the River Thames and a few blocks in and it's still living it up that large.



Here's Big Ben. It photographs well, what can I say. It also tells time, which is a hell of a bonus. Looking at this picture, I wonder if the dude with the guidebook down there ever figured out where he was going. Probably not. He looked American, after all.

After this we checked out my sister's school since her class was finally over. Then we hopped on the tube, went back to where we parked the car, paid the $20 in parking charges for 3 hours (you read that right) and all piled into the car and drove up to Bath. Bath is a good, old-fashioned town, with what was probably my favorite pub, a place called "The New Inn." More about Bath tomorrow, though. I've certainly typed enough for one night. If you've read this far, I give you a round of applause...

Sunday, April 24, 2005

Hey, 1000 visitors!

Time to throw a party or something. Craziness.

I'll be posting my writeup of day one of the vacation tonight. It took me a while to go through my photos and weed out the extra-crummy ones. I've still got like 150 of them, though. Don't worry, I won't be putting them all up. Hope you have fun with it like I did.

Friday, April 22, 2005

I must be mellowing out in my old age.

I received an envelope from the IRS today. It was my 1040, politely returned to me with a separate form attached. This form told me that I was missing necessary paperwork to complete my tax return. I realized I was missing it because they had lost all of it. I guess stapling it all to the 1040 didn't mean much to them, since they removed the staple and lost everything that I had carefully filled out over the span of two weeks. Back in the old days, I would have gone ballistic after finding this out, destroying something in my house, most likely a chair of some sort. Maybe a trash can or a conveniently placed wall. Mark can attest to this type of behavior, having witnessed it firsthand in the past. I guess you room with me for three years, you see me lose my mind more than a few times. Nowadays, this is what goes through my mind:

"It's a good thing I made photocopies of everything. I will resend this information to the IRS tomorrow morning."

In the past, my reaction would have been something like this:

"FUCK!!!!!!! I'M GONNA FUCKING KILL SOMEONE!!!!! FUCK!!!!! MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!! I HATE YOU IRS AND EVERYTHING YOU STAND FOR!!!!!!!! FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HULK SMASH!!!!!!!!!!"

Something tells me I needed anger management classes back then. Maybe age really has tempered my rage or something. Maybe I realized that I don't have that much to get pissed over anyway. Who knows. Either way, I'll be filing through TurboTax or some such software next year, since government employees who are likely paid $30 an hour can't comprehend that all that assorted paperwork that people attach to their 1040s actually means something...

Oh yeah, seems to be that the new upgrade for Firefox has completely broken any blogs that have been updated recently. They all point you to Blogger's main page for some reason. Internet Explorer doesn't have any problems, though. Of course, if you're reading this that probably doesn't matter to you, does it? I'd complain about Blogger's reliability, but it's free so there's really no point, is there? Still, Blogger needs to get that fixed, por favor.

I will post pictures later, blah blah blah, etc., etc., etc. Visit some of the sites newly added to my sidebar. You'll feel better about me not delivering on any of my promises. Honest.

Wednesday, April 20, 2005

I am the laziest bastard ever.

Ever kinda want to do something but not right now even though you should and then you keep putting it off and putting it off and putting it off and putting it off?

Yeah, me too.

I'm getting bad about reading random blogs. So many of them make me want to just find this person and throttle the life out of them for sucking so bad. Then I realize that there's probably been at least 2 or 3 people so far who have found mine and think the exact same thing, so who am I to judge? Anyway, I'm going to start putting the cream of the crop (in my not-so-humble opinion) on the right hand side there, so maybe I'll have somebody other than Matt who updates their blog on a somewhat regular basis. Not that I'm one to talk, but hey. Maybe they'll even link to me to validate my otherwise ignored-by-anyone-who-doesn't-know-me-personally-already blog.

I know this isn't one of the pictures I said I'd put up, but I'm gonna put it up anyway because it cracks me up for no discernible reason. Yet, it sums up that weird-ass commercial perfectly...



This has been a completely random post in lieu of actually posting pictures and recaps like I said I would. I'm all for useful procrastination.

Tomorrow's recipe: chicken!

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

More recovery time required.

You wouldn't believe how much stuff there is to keep track of once you get home from a long, strange trip like the one I've been on. I feel like I did on vacation -- there's only so much you can do in one day. I had plans to update the blog daily with anecdotes and photos from my trip while over there, but as you can see, that didn't quite work out. Same goes for tonight. I'm fading fast, though I do seem to be on a somewhat regular sleep schedule already. Go figure. I guess I should get jetlagged more often...

Tomorrow. Promise. Maybe.

Adobe buys out Macromedia.

About time, guys.

I'm not that big on monopolies, but at least now they can design an interface for Dreamweaver and Flash that doesn't suck. Thank you!

Monday, April 18, 2005

Back in the U.S.S.A.

I made it. I've been up since 2am Eastern Standard Time. I am now officially tired. I am also a sad panda. Looks like I'm not part of the cool list of links on Erin's site anymore. I will now shed tears of sorrow at the lost 2 or 3 clickthroughs a month I was getting from that. It's more a status thing lost, though. Either way, it makes me sad.

It honestly feels like a complete eternity since I was last in my house. I wonder if I'll remember how to drive my car when I have to go to work tomorrow. I'm surprised I remembered where my computer was, even. I'm surprised my cats acknowledged me when I got back. Oh wait, they didn't. Hmm.

I promise actual recaps and pictures and fun stuff tomorrow. Honest. Unless I'm jetlagged, but I think staying up for the longest day ever will help with that. Hopefully.

Sunday, April 17, 2005

Mak-Fu: Da Return!

To the United States, that is. Getting on the plane tomorrow morning, once again hoping my fate isn't to plunge into the cold waters of the Atlantic. Let's hope not. I'll start my recap phase once I get back, but don't expect anything late tomorrow night, cause I just won't be up for it after an entire day spent in airports, y'know? Especially Chicago O'Hare, which I get to sit in for ages and ages waiting for my flight to Jacksonville. Maybe I'll run into Erin, but I highly doubt it, since my luck has been so damn poor the past few days. That's why I'm worrying about the plunging into the Atlantic thing. Did I mention Oslo sucked? Here's Maki's handy-dandy travel trip for Oslo:

Don't go to Oslo in April. Maybe ever.

There you go! Hope that helps you out. If you go another time of the year (preferably summer) make sure that the person who suggests it knows what the hell they're talking about and actually has stuff for you to do, cause otherwise you'll sound like Bill Simmons from ESPN Page 2 bitching about Jacksonville hosting the Super Bowl, except you won't be spending even more on food and such than you were in London. Yeah.

See you all when I get back, and whenever the hell I decide to post my recap stuff with more pictures...

Thursday, April 14, 2005

Looking forward to Norway.

Sorry for the lack of pictures the last few posts. I haven't had much time to transfer them off of the camera and upload them and all of that jazz. You're lucky you're even getting a post or two from me anyway!

Today is Tower of London, then I hop on a plane to Oslo, Norway tonight. Hopefully a weekend in Norway will be good times, even if I don't speak the language. That may actually help my chances with the ladies. You never know...

London is the real melting pot.

Anyone who says something about the United States being a true melting pot is an idiot. Seriously. I used to think like that, at least until I got here. Now I see that the US is about half white people, a third black people and the remaining fraction is predominantly oriental. Come to London some time. You'll see every race represented, and the proportions are much more even. Granted, you'll still see more white people than not, but you'll also have plenty of Black, Indian, Middle Eastern, Korean, Chinese, Japanese and even Hassidic Jews about. Try finding a high proportion of Middle Eastern folks anywhere in the US, especially these days. Not gonna happen. Walk through London for 20 minutes and I guarantee you'll see someone from each of these races at some point. It's a very cool thing. Another cool thing? They all seem to be making enough money to live here, which is more than I could say for myself if I were to attempt to move here...

Oh yeah, I only weigh 13 stone. Sorry if anybody's calculations were off. I guess weighing myself while wearing shoes, jeans, jacket, etc. Wasn't the best idea. So yeah, take me over the 14 stones next time. 13 is another matter entirely.

Tuesday, April 12, 2005

Sticks and Stones.

I weigh just over 14 stone. Thought you should know. If given the choice to pick up 14 rocks or me, I guess you should take the rocks. I have no idea how many sticks I weigh, though. Sorry, they don't have a scale for that.

Alright, it's London picture time.

As promised, pictures. Today was one of the nicest days of the year so far in London, which is awesome since when I arrived it was friggin' cold and drizzly. Not fun weather, to say the least. I mean, take a look...



That's me at Trafalgar Square, the central point of London just a little bit after getting picked up from the airport on Thursday. I will make mention that I'd been up for 26 consecutive hours at that point. Far from a record, but still. Probably not the best picture of me to post as my first picture here, but that's life, I guess. Anyway, I'm wearing 4 layers of clothing at that point, and the rain was about to start coming down, even if the sky looks somewhat clear. It lies, though. The weather was shite. Welcome to London! Things would get better after my weekend away, though...



See? This was today, and the weather was much, much better. Notice the lack of layers, with only one sleeves-rolled-up t-shirt? That's my kind of weather, I tell ya. I'll admit that I don't look noticeably happier, but I am. Honest. This was taken on The Eye, a giant ferris wheel on the bank of the Thames that gives you a great view of the entire city, but like everything else in London, costs an arm and a leg to ride. It was worth it, though, especially on a day like today.

The Eye gives you great views like this, all for only £12.50!

"Hey look kids, Big Ben, Parliament."

Big Maki vs. Big Ben... Ben is definitely bigger.

Big Ben is bigger than me. For some reason, I seem happier than usual about this.

Now I seem particularly tiny.

This shot just isn't as cool, but that tower of Parliament sure looks a lot bigger than me, even though it's shorter than Big Ben. Go figure.

I'm seeing the changing of the guard at Buckingham Palace tomorrow, then maybe a movie. Then another pub. The days are just packed, I tell ya.

Monday, April 11, 2005

Stranger in a kinda-strange land.

Yep, I finally made it to London, after many a delay. I've been crammed into just about every vehicle possible in the past 3 days, be it airplane, train, automobile or bus. It's been great.

I heard there was some kind of wedding happening here this weekend or something. A prince or something? Who knows. Maybe this wedding was why my ride took 3 hours to get to the airport. It's possible. Maybe it's the fact that everybody drives on the wrong side of the road. This wouldn't be such a problem if the roads weren't so narrow you could lay down crossways and bump your head and your toes on opposite curbs at the same time. It also wouldn't be a problem if everybody didn't park all over the already-rail-thin roads. It also might not be a problem if everyone didn't drive 125 miles a hour down these winding, thin, car-infested roads. Maybe. That's what makes it, exciting, though.

Stayed in Bath the first night, then journeyed to Wales for the next evening. This would explain my lack of posting or e-mail response, since I've been internetless since arriving. Internet access isn't high on the priority list for the Welsh, I guess. I will say this, though. Welsh people are very nice, very cool and will drink you under the table, no matter how experienced you are. I'm going to use the excuse that I've been wretchedly jetlagged since I got here. My body refuses to adjust, sadly. You'd think the insomnia would do me well, since I'm supposed to be up when the insomnia would hit anyway, but that's just not the case. Get me comfortable for more than 45 seconds and I'm liable to dose off. Good thing our car was microscopic, eh?

Speaking of microscopic, my sister's flat fits the definition quite nicely. It's 75% stairs, since it's 3 stories, yet the rooms are roughly the size of my bathroom back home. I tell you what, I'm just too damn big for this country. And I'm really not that big. Yeesh.

I know I'm rambling here, but that's okay. Another thing I want to mention is British TV. It's so crappy that it's awesome. Imagine if Fox handled everybody's reality TV shows, but they did it with less class and no censorship. That's British TV. If I lived here I might actually watch more than two shows a week. Good thing I don't live here. Yet.

Speaking of living here in London, I'd suggest taking out a second and third mortgage if you wish to actually be able to pay for anything, like say, food here. This is the single most expensive place I've ever been to, and that's saying something, since I've also been to Tokyo. London spends Tokyo right under the table, believe me. Strangely enough, though, beer is much cheaper, it seems. I'll have a whole post about pubs soon enough. I think I'm going to miss those the most, I can already tell.

I'll have to give a pictorial recap of my weekend with pictures later, since it's midnight already. Got some good ones, expecting to get a lot more now that I'm back in London proper for 4 days.

Somebody outside is playing The Strokes rather loudly. I thought the British were supposed to be ahead of the curve and cooler musically? Somebody is letting me down, here.

Thursday, April 07, 2005

11:55 am flight to Washington DC? What 11:55 am flight to Washington DC?

Oh, the one you cancelled? Okay. How about the 1:50 pm one? Oh, that one's booked full and there's no possible way of getting me on it, huh? Wow, thanks for getting me on the 6:50 pm flight. That'll really come in handy, considering my flight to London/Heathrow leaves DC at 6:20 pm. Yeah, I don't figure the plane you put me on has 1.21 jigawatts and a flux capacitor to send me into the past so I can make the connection, does it? No, it doesn't. Hey, at least now you've got me on a new flight to Heathrow that leaves at 9:35 pm, giving me 50 minutes to make a connection at a separate international terminal. That's provided the flight from Jacksonville makes it on time.

I'm so glad I used up a vacation day at work to deal with this. Son of a fucking bitch.

Yup, still awake.

Put that in your little plastic cup and suck it down, NyQuil.

Another bad idea.

It's probably a bad idea to try and pull an all-nighter so I can sleep on the plane and be ready for morning when my flight lands at 7am London time. This would be an especially bad idea, considering I took NyQuil about 20 minutes before I decided to pull an all-nighter.

It's probably a bad idea to take a DayQuil to counteract the NyQuil sleepiness. Yeah, I've heard something about mixing uppers and downers being bad.

It's probably a bad idea to still be up. Crap.

Bad ideas.

It's probably a bad idea to catch up on the episodes of Lost that I've missed on the evening before I'm about to hop on a plane that will be taking me on a Transatlantic flight in the morning. At least, it would be if I was a wuss who isn't used to flying. Which I am most certainly not. A wuss, that is. Watching a show about the aftermath of a plane crash doesn't make it seem so bad. I still have no idea what my flashback story would be, though. It couldn't possibly top Hurley's. Dammit.

It's probably a bad idea to start packing at 1:17am when the flight leaves in the morning, huh? At least I have my passport ready. And my iPod. Honestly, what else could I possibly need?

It's probably a bad idea to pack shorts and t-shirts when it's frickin' freezing over in England. It's April. What the hell is wrong with that country, anyway?

It's probably a bad idea to name my playlist "It's Maki's down-tempo playlist for mature, sexy adults" since Matt spammed the hell out of my comments, preventing anyone else from posting entries. (That's the story I'm sticking to.) He wins. I guess you've all missed your shot at iPod immortality. At least this time.

It's probably not such a bad idea to rename that playlist "Tenacious D made the joke first" just to piss off my contest winner.

It's probably a bad idea to be posting on my blog when I should be packing.

It's probably a bad idea to try to write up my review of Beck's Guero right now. The short version? It's good.

It's probably a bad idea to promise to post pictures of some sort once I'm over there. Or to promise to send postcards. Or to promise to bring back cool stuff. I did sign up for a photobucket account, so there's an off-chance you might get the first promise, at least. Maybe. It depends on whether or not I decide to show you pictures of what I look like, thus ruining the image you've created for me in your mind. Well, all three of you that I don't run into on a daily basis in Jacksonville anyway. We'll see. Just don't expect any pictures like these.

Stay safe, kids. I'll see ya when I see ya.

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

Name this playlist!

I need a cool name for this playlist. It's all relatively jazzy downtempo-y stuff that should do me alright when I'm on a 12-hour plane flight to London in approximately 36 hours. I'm not sure how steady my sister's internet is over there, so I'm sure you'll understand if you don't get your (almost) daily fix from here during the 11 days I'm over there. Anyway, help me name this list. It's 2 hours, 24 minutes and 37 seconds of cool. As always, if you're interested in any of these tracks, send me a shout at bigmaki (at) gmail (dot) com and I'll hook you up with any and all tracks as soon as I get the chance.

1. "Take Five" by Dave Brubeck Quartet
2. "All Blues" by Miles Davis
3. "La Femme d'Argent" by Air
4. "Unravel" by Björk
5. "Black Milk" by Massive Attack
6. "Midnight In A Perfect World" by DJ Shadow
7. "Ponderosa" by Tricky
8. "Trouble From The River" by Quantic
9. "Indra" by Thievery Corporation
10. "Down & To The Left" by Amon Tobin
11. "Go Faster" by Propellerheads
12. "Something Wicked This Way Comes" by Barry Adamson
13. "Rodney Yates" by David Holmes
14. "Over" by Portishead
15. "Rabbit In Your Headlights" by U.N.K.L.E.
16. "Changeling" by DJ Shadow
17. "Destination" by Roni Size/Reprazent
18. "Polaris" by Zero 7
19. "Country Livin' (The World I Know)" by Esthero
20. "6 Underground (Nellee Hooper Edit)" by Sneaker Pimps
21. "Run On" by Moby
22. "Restless" by The Clifford Gilberto Rhythm Combination
23. "Big Sea" by Funki Porcini
24. "La Mer" by Nine Inch Nails
25. "Big Amoeba Sound" by Max & Harvey
26. "The Sea" by Morcheeba
27. "Arcane" by Arc

Yes, I know four of those came from Xen Cuts (disc 2, no less.) I've been listening to it a lot lately, so they got thrown on there. I'm sure all three of the cool people out there realized that. Anyway, give me names, please. The winner will be immortalized on my iPod. This is quite an honor, let me tell you...

Monday, April 04, 2005

The Sin City review. It's long.

Sorry I haven't posted in the last few days. I've been really busy, then sick. Being sick is lame. Very lame. Anyway, saw Sin City on Friday night. Here's the review, which I intended to post a lot earlier.

How do you review a film that you know has instantly jumped into your top 10 films ever? It's tough to do, probably why I've been sitting on this review since Friday night, not having found the words to describe it. It doesn't help that all of my movie reviews thus far have been either zero-star or four-star reviews, with nothing in-between. What can I say? Mediocrity doesn't push me to write, I guess. Needless to say, this one will be a four-star review. Sin City may not be everybody's cup of tea, but for those with the stomach, this movie is an instant classic.

Most people will describe this film as very "Tarantino-esque." It's equal parts Kill Bill, with the over-the-top violence, and equal parts Pulp Fiction, with three interconnected (but separate) stories and charismatic criminals as our main characters. It doesn't help that Tarantino filmed a segment (the car ride with Jackie-Boy and Dwight) as "guest director." He'll get a lot of credit for something that was originally written long before he became famous, and while his scene is well done, the rest of the film has such a life of its own that Robert Rodriguez won't get half the credit he deserves for creating this, since most will assume it's Tarantino's doing. It was a gutsy move by Rodriguez to resign from the directors' guild in order to have Frank Miller on as a co-director, but it demonstrates his dedication to getting the source material right and to Miller, who really earns the credit given to him.

In reading the comics and watching the film, it's easy to see which shots are identical to what first appeared on the page over a decade ago. It's also amazing how every character (save for one) hits the exact note and tone that was in my mind when reading these stories originally. That's got to be the main thing that Miller brought to the table. Bruce Willis isn't on the screen, it's Hartigan. It's not Clive Owen up there, it's Dwight. Everyone disappears so fully into these characters that you don't even think of them as actors in a movie. They inhabit these characters so fully that you can't help but be mesmerized by them. My only complaint casting-wise would be that Michael Madsen's delivery of Bob's lines early in the movie are a little too over-the-top and stilted to fit properly with what everyone else is doing. Luckily his appearance later on is much more in line with the rest of the cast. It's unfortunate that those botched lines show up in the first ten minutes, which really worried me. Soon enough though, Marv (a truly amazing Mickey Rourke) is on screen and any worries I may have had are erased almost immediately.

I must make a special mention of Mickey Rourke here. The guy's become a joke since the '80s, and it's really a shame. One would hope that this movie does for him what Pulp Fiction did for John Travolta in the mid-'90s. He's absolutely perfect as Marv. Granted, he's given the meatiest storyline of the three main characters, but it still could have been a disaster with the wrong actor. In hearing his voiceovers, I wouldn't be surprised if they cast him based on those, and the way he worked in the prosthetics was just icing on the cake. He takes the role and brings everything you could possibly want to it. I can't say enough good things about him. He's going to be the favorite character for a lot of people after seeing this, and he's earned it. Somebody give this guy some more good roles now, please.

I'm a sucker for style, I can freely admit. It's not often that you see a movie created in such a way as to be completely original. You know, the kind of movie that will become one of those milestones for which a whole bunch of copycats will be judged. Like The Matrix before it, Sin City will have a slew of imitators trying to cop the style that works so incredibly well here. Much like that first Matrix film, the style and use of special effects is so integral to the story that it simply wouldn't work without it. In imitating Miller's stark black and white artwork used in the original comics, the film cleverly avoids an NC-17 rating, despite an incredibly graphic amount of violence that occurs throughout the film. Once the DVD comes out, I'm sure we'll be playing "the Sin City drinking game." The rules are simple -- take a sip every time somebody dies. The only exception is that you must chug during the culmination of Dwight's story. I guarantee you'll be wasted within 30 minutes.

It's not just the body count that's so excessive in this film, but the way characters (and cannon fodder) are killed as well. Fans who have read the original graphic novels will figure that Kevin and Yellow Bastard's fates would be toned down somewhat to make an R rating. To their (and my) surprise, not an ounce of it has been watered down. True, stark black and while silhouettes are used to mask the violence, but it's still there, and you know exactly what's going on, even if you're not seeing it directly. They also make a nice tie-in to the original material, and you tend to think that with such devotion to the original stories, the scenes would have been filmed the same way regardless what rating Rodriguez and Miller were shooting for.

Some will complain that this movie is an exercise in nihilism. To a certain extent, they'd be right. Nothing matters in Basin City. Characters only feel that they've been redeemed once they're "killed lots of people." That's what film noir is, though. Some may not find deeper meaning in Marv's quest, but he does it for love, in a twisted way, and in a twisted sense of what's "right." The same goes for Hartigan, the same goes for Dwight. These are incredibly flawed people, yet they are doing what they're doing for the greater good, even if their methods are among the most vile ever put on film. This is what noir would be in the modern day. This is what noir is in the modern day. There's plenty to analyze here, both from a technical standpoint and a character motivation and storlyine standpoint. There's tremendous depth in this film that many will miss, much like many dismissed Fight Club as being "a movie about guys beating each other up."Don't let Sin City fall into that same trap for you.

I've written more than enough words for one review. If you have the stomach for violence, go see Sin City right now. If you'd rather see Miss Congeniality 2 or something, well, I guess there's not much hope for you, is there? I'm sure there will be another cheesy romantic comedy for you down the pike soon enough. Movies like Sin City don't come around very often, so for those who can appreciate it, cherish this one.

Four out of four stars. Highest possible recommendation.

Friday, April 01, 2005

I have an idea!

Let's set off our car alarm at 3:45 am! Let's not shut it off for about 45 seconds! Let's repeat this 7 times in a row! Let's argue loudly in the street each time we do it!

Somebody's gonna die, and I'm gonna go to jail for a very long time. Can chronic insomnia be used as an insanity defense? Or, at least someone reactivating that insomnia by awakening me from one of the few times I'm actually soundly asleep? Only thing that could have made it worse would be if they had loudly yelled, "APRIL FOOL!" after the last time they shut it off. I would have made national headlines with the violent scene that would have erupted had that been the case. CSI would be documenting the aftermath for weeks, guaranteed. George W. Bush would go on the air and be all like, "sorry, but the man just went nukular." It would have been a crazy scene. Good thing they didn't say that.

Friday is not off to a good start. Red Bull here I come!